I wait. Always.
I wait in lines, for my husband, for bedtime. I wait for milestones to pass and I wait for difficult times to be done. Sometimes, I think…
“If I can just get past….then I will be fine.”
This is such a lie.
In November, our family is travelling to England to visit Chad’s sister and family. LAX to London is about 11 hours with no stop, no break, no wiggle room, no playground or bed on which to stretch one’s legs. There will be no place to change a dirty diaper except on my lap or on a narrow plane seat. I know I am over-worrying things, but right now, I am ONLY thinking about the departing plane ride. I am waiting for this to be over.
So then, this morning, this is what I think. How far into our 9 day trip will I begin to think about the return flight, and start to wait for that to be over? Ohhh, no. I could wait and worry for the rest of my life and never be done.
This is the lie: there will always be something to “get past”, and once I “get past” it, I really won’t be “fine” because there will be something else…
Solution? Don’t worry, Sarah. The 11 hour trip will be just fine. Yes, there might be crying and snot, and there will certainly be poop. There will be sleepy heads and cranky words from every mouth and upset tummies and “when will we be there?”. There will be wide awake eyes in the middle of the night because of the eight hour time difference and there will be emotional outbursts for sure.
I must live in today and cherish tomorrow, not worrying about it getting over. I must relax in the now and look forward to the adventure of taking my almost-six-year old on the adventure of her life!
So today, I am waiting. But I am waiting for the good, the lovely, the beauty of a country-undiscovered and relationships renewed. I am waiting to hold my baby nephew for the first time and see his new smiles. I am waiting to relax in the comfort of my sister-in-law’s kitchen over coffee and letting the cousins play on Thanksgiving. I am waiting and I am happy to wait for all of this.
Oh my, I am always saying the same thing to myself. Life is just a series of things to get past…this I learn more every day.
Once you are in England you will forget all about the plane ride. Have you ever been? It is good for the soul.
My word of advice is have LOW EXPECTATIONS. It seems like when I lower mine then I have a great time and enjoy the moment.
It will be a blast!
Oh, I loved this. I spend way too much time wondering about the ‘what ifs’ — and not enjoying what IS. Thank you!
It is so much easier sad than done! I find myself far to often saying, well once this happens then… UGH! I really want to cherish tomorrow and live in today. It is a challenge (at least for me) and it takes focus to look at today and not tomorrow. I don’t want to miss what is happening today because I am too busy looking ahead.
i did the same flight a year ago by myself with my then 3 1/2 year-old and my almost 1 year old. we made it! we all wore very comfy clothes, them in jammies. you can do it! don’t worry about the flight – anticipate the time you’ll have there! of all the special new treats and toys i brought my oldest to keep her occupied, the tv on the seat in front of her was the most exciting. good luck!
Oh, I’m so jealous…of your trip to London, I mean. I hope you have a wonderful time & you just pray over those girls before you trip & that the Lord will give them a extra special “calm” while traveling. I might also suggest a little DVD player…has made a huge difference when we traveled. Although we haven’t been traveling for that length of time & you might have already thought of this..Ok, now I’m rambling. Have a great time!
When I was prenant with David I worried something could go wrong, and it hit me…if he’s born healthy, then I’ll start to worry about SIDS and once he is a year old, I’ll worry about soemthing else. It never ends. Then he was born with lots of health issues. The worrying didn’t help anyway! All we have is the moment we are in. I want to live in the moment.
STORY OF MY LIFE!!! I read years ago that we tend to look at our problems and think “if I can just overcome this obstacle, then I will be ready to begin living!” When actually, life IS a series of obstacles… and the sooner we come to accept that,the happier we will be. As this author said, “instead of fighting with life, we need to learn to dance with it.” I loved that, and I think of it often. I guess it’s human nature! Hearing you say it, too, makes me feel more normal!
So much of my frustration and irritation comes from my expectations… I think I expect every day to be “normal,” easy, healthy, and safe. Then, when it’s not what I expect or it doesn’t meet my standards somehow, I’m frustrated or irritated. HELLO! When am I going to learn this???? I’m making slow progress, but it’s very slow, indeed.
Really loved this post today! Thanks for the reminder!
Your last paragraph said it all… And just look for the positive in this trip. Of course there will be times you want to scream… but just try to laugh it off instead. Allow your husband to help. Don’t try to take it all on yourself. You will be fine and you’ll have a great time. And when it’s all over and you’re home… look back and say… what a great adventure that was for all of us…
Too funny. I read this post earlier today, but didn’t have a chance to read the comments. I was going to write you back, and tell you how I’ve been thinking about this very thing a lot lately. About how I’ve spent most of my life waiting to get through things. And now I see that I’m not alone.
Thank you for putting this into words!
I love this. I am a if we can just get to the other side of this kind of person too. We are driving 20 hours north for Thanksgiving. I will have to take your words in my heart for the ride.
Do have a wonderful time.
Kate