Tuesday December 2nd, 2008
When my oldest began first grade this year, she also began “all-day” school days. At 8:15 in the morning I drop her off and she doesn’t get back in my car again until 3:10 in the afternoon.
I was worried. Not for her safety, or that I would miss her. But I was worried the the long school day would be too much for her. I’ve written before that we are dancing around a possible 
ADD diagnosis for her and my main concern was that nearly 7 hours at school would break what little hold on focus and concentration she could manage.
ADD diagnosis for her and my main concern was that nearly 7 hours at school would break what little hold on focus and concentration she could manage.
But here we are, over 3 months in and she is doing very well. She has had a few discipline mishaps, but nothing out of the ordinary for any other almost-seven-year-old and certainly nothing that surprises me.
But what DOES surprise me is her. Just her. She has wowed me. I guess I simply didn’t believe in her, believe that she could DO it. And she has. She IS doing it. And she is doing it well. The past three months have taught me that over and over again that my children will surprise me.
I had underestimated my daughter’s growth and maturity over the summer. I hadn’t thought that she would want to please her teacher and that she would want to stay in her seat. I had neglected to believe in her.
I know there will be times of lost faith and disappointment. It is easy to get lost in the dirty, messy NOW of the day. But I am realizing what my girls are capable of (that my six-year-old can be help me in the kitchen and my little one can brush her teeth and take her plate to the sink).
I believe in my two girls. I believe in their beauty and their desire to stay on this side of right and wrong. I believe in their intelligence and their increasing maturity.
I think they need me to believe in them. It might be the only way they can truly succeed.
Very true! If we don’t believe in them, who will? We may not realize it but we project our belief or disbelief to them. It’s a powerful thing.
I too was worried about Hope in full time school. I think I sold her short a bit. But like you said, she has taken to it like a fish in water!!!
I really appreciate this post, Sarah. So glad I checked your blog today! I have been really concerned about N. lately because he has difficulty in social/structured settings. Been fearing the worst and worrying…forgetting to believe in him as you said. He needs me to. This was really encouraging for me. Thank you!
Tis true! Believing in our kids gives them SO much confidence, whether we voice it out loud or not, they know how we feel. Thank you Sarah, for the beautiful post.
I like this. I think I should “hover” less and “believe” more.
Love it!
It kills me to think that there are moments that pass me by, moments when I’m not aware of two blinking eyes looking up to me, wondering, asking,
“Do you believe in me, dad? Cause I don’t know if I do.”
I can’t think of many things more important in our parenting than answering that question with a resounding YES. In word and deed both.
i believe in you, girl.
love
dad
mmmm. your last sentence brings it home.
ya know how a child feels when they know theyve disappointed you. how much more powerful is our belief in them.
you are such a good mama. i know, i dont know you – but from you put out here for us…yah. youre a good mama!
so true sarah, so true.
(it just ate my comment. here’s take 2:)
i feel so validated and empowered when i know someone believes in me.
i try to be intentional to voice it when i believe in others. they need to feel the strength that comes with knowing someone’s right in it with you.