Of these women, some have developed codependency issues after their husbands or boyfriends introduced porn into the relationship. And some have simply found themselves relying on internet porn more and more, to soothe or distract themselves from some unresolved issue in their lives.

Messages like yours display assurance and positivity from which we can all learn and benefit.

Have been thinking about how to answer you (from my perspective). I beleive it has crossed gender lines because women (me) want to conform to the “ideal” of what attracts men. I thought that if I watched it surely I could learn to be that: sexy, attractive to my husband after all this is what he chose to look at vs the real me. How wrong I was and now thank God that I’ve come back to my walk with the Lord and am praying hw woudl be delivered from this affliction.

I had never viewed porn until recently and then it was women on women. I am married with 3 kids. For the conversation, I would never have gone into a store to buy porn – it was totally the accessibility thing of the internet at a time when I was in a lot of pain. I can totally see how it could have developed into an addiction though, once I opened that door. My husband doesn’t use porn or struggle with that area, so it’s never been something in our marriage.

As a woman, my struggle hasn’t been so much around romance/fantasy as around sex and identity. I turned to porn for arousal and release, and beneath that was/is a lot of other stuff going on. I’m not excusing it, just saying that it seems important to look beneath the outward behaviour to see what is going on. It’s not often we sin in an area we are whole in…so if we’re not whole in this area, what’s going on?

For me, this is crucial: to be asking the question, What are the roots? I don’t want only to deal with the fruit/symptoms or more bad fruit will just pop up somewhere else; I also want God to track back to the diseased roots, to deliver and heal from where this all started, so that all the parts of my self can be brought home into Him.

Also, I wanted to say how much it has brought healing and wonder to me to see that Sarah’s dad has contributed to this, and so lovingly – how outrageous and wonderful that Sarah and Chad can have the courage to bring all this into the open, and to have such support and love from Sarah’s father in this very place. Talk about breaking taboos! You guys rock! How this demonstrates to me the Father’s compassion and covering and acceptance and love. Thank you, all of you.

Porn is like a cancer in that once it’s in the mind, it never fully goes away. The Holy Spirit keeps it at bay but if given any opportunity, it will ramp up to it’s former fervor and strength in the blink of an eye.

I hate that I brought it into my marriage but I can honestly say I have learned from the mistake and I am vigilant about it never getting its foot back in the door!!

http://www.covenanteyes.com/blog/2009/08/17/podcast-porn-addiction-among-women-part-1/

The Porn industry is most definitely looking for ways to improve it’s already enormous profit bottom line by reaching out to new markets and new marketing tools (to more women and via ‘cheap’ electronic dissimulation to a wider public).

Romance novels as porn for women? hmmmm – in the sense that it allows a woman to find intimacy of a kind that she feels more ‘comfortable’ with than with the usual type they might find with most of the men in their lives – quite possibly, i suppose? That it sets her up to find more failure of true intimacy with another human being – most likely. It ‘idealises’ what a man and woman ‘should’ experience in the way that Hollywood and Mills and Boone tend to portray as what we should all expect in our romantic lives – but which is rarely the way they would have us believe it is in our real lives.

Hard-core porn ‘allows’ men a way to gain personal intimacy – or to fill a ‘need’ for intimate contact – at the expense of teaching them or their learning how to be truly intimate and all that that requires of us – including the ability to be vulnerable and open to criticism.

It supports the lie that personal power over another is more important that being a servant to them. That we can better get what we as an individual wants by having power over someone else (or their image in our mind) than in giving them back their own power which is True power indeed – The kind God wields towards us.

Sadly, many women who now feel able to own more of their power in society are falling for the lie – that they become more powerful by taking it from others instead of helping others gain it for themselves.

i have heard recently that a few women are now choosing to make their living by writing and selling ‘erotic’ literature – sort of Mills and Boon meets Playboy’s letters to the editor. Erotic fantasy replacing intimate fact.

i feel this can only further add to the problem – and make true intimacy with members of the opposite sex (and of course these days with members of the same sex also) even harder for the majority to find.

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