I have at least six of my daughter’s toy horses in a bag with broken legs and hooves.
I have a sewing basket for needles, thread and homeless buttons. I have a place on my desk for tape to mend unintentionally ripped coloring pages. I have boxes of batteries to fix electronic toys that have made their last sounds.
I fix broken things.
I put bandages on three-year-old knees and use words to bind up little spirits who’ve been wounded. [I do the best I can to fix those].
As a mother, I’m a fixer of the broken.
But today, tonight, I need a broken heart. In fact I’m looking for one. And I don’t want to fix it.
I need a heart that breaks for the world: a heart that hurts for the lost, for the less than, and for the needy. I need a heart that is broken for the hungry, for the ones without homes and for the fatherless.
I want eyes that well up when I witness oppression or slavery, for war-torn families and famine-ridden land. I want to break in half for the ones who are dying, who are starving, who’ve been victimized.
I need a broken heart.
I want to feel for the unloved, the unwanted, and the unneeded. I even want to break for those that hurt and abuse, because they’ve been abused [and You love them].
I want You to ravage me, ruin me and destroy me for normal life.
I need a broken heart, one that
glue,
tape,
or words can’t fix.
Because only with a broken heart can I learn how to love.
Do you?
Tags: brokenness, healing, love, mending
so beautifully said.
i want to be more broken today than i was yesterday. that i might love more deeply than i ever have before.
Absolutely agree. I think I get caught up in my own day-to-day world and unconsciously insulate myself from things which would cause pain. Pain is often involved when something – especially on or in us – is broken. So I guess we need to learn to welcome and embrace the pain which will give us the requisite brokenness to love and the usher in motivation when action is needed more than empathy.
Amen……..
Sarah,
I began this prayer two years ago. I asked God to brake me. For Him, for others, and for my own good.
He answered, and the work began. He is still at work. And I am a better person because of it.
But I am not going to lie to you.
It hurts. It pains. And at times it stretches me so far that I have screamed out in agony.
This prayer is not for the faint of heart I have learned.
It is for those that want more, and are willing to surrender….. everything.
And in the end you will get more.
More of God. More of what really matters. And more of what will stand the test of time.
I have been weaker…. and now stronger. Crippled….. and now mending. Wounded…. and now bound up.
I am now completely His where as I was completely my own.
I will praying for you Sarah.
I wish we all had the courage to pray this…… we would be a better people, world, and Christians because of it.
I didn’t understand my own words that I was uttering at the time. I didn’t realize the impact they would have on my own life and the lives of those around me…….
But I wouldn’t change a thing. I don’t ever want to go back.
This is who I want to be….
Beat up….. bruised…. broken……
And in the process of being made whole again.
Blessings. <3
Melissa D.
go to Africa this summer… it will COMPLETELY break you. worked for me
i see everything and i mean everything so differently now. and i will give back to the organization i went with forever because they feed orphans, train pastors, heal people, do surgeries, deliver babies and tell people about Jesus. They are his hands and feet and I will continue to go so that I can continue to be reminded. It was amazing (and we actually had fun too!). operationhopeusa.org but both God and myself love your desire for a broken heart. truly.
Break me, Dear Lord, Your will- not mine.
Thanks for the post, sweet girl.
Prayers for your and yours
love
Reese
Wonderfully written.
I too want my heart to break for injustice. abuse. and all things that are not of God. I tend to become callous too easily…but my prayer is for a broken heart for what breaks His.
Sarah, Thank you so much for this post. Thank you for reminding me that a broken heart can be a grace.
Your post actually reminds me of the song Honsana by Brooke Fraser. There is a line that goes “Heal my heart and make it clean / Open up my eyes to the things unseen / Show me how to love like you have loved me / Break my heart for what is yours / Everything I am for your kingdom’s cause / As I walk from earth into eternity”
May God bless us all with that grace!
God bless
I prayed the other day that the Lord would help me to see others thru His eyes and love them with His love.. Thank you for the reminder
.
Beautifully stated. I look forward to reading your blog every single day! So inspiring. You have been given a gift with your words!! Thank you for sharing them.