From 39 thousand feet in the air, the Rocky Mountains look like the topography on a toddler’s train table. The foothills look like crumpled paper bags dusted with snow and forests are thick and black puddles of oil on faded concrete.
Everything looks different from almost 8 miles above the earth.
I live in a big town. And I go to the same small church I’ve always gone to. My friends are moms. My girls will do the same things this week as they did last week. We’ve lived in the same house, given to the same charities, eaten the same whole wheat bread for a while now.
I fear change.
I’m scared to do simple things like change the girls’ gymnastic class times because they might miss their friends or instructor. I’m scared to change dentists, doctors or the girl who waxes my eyebrows.
I read the same blogs every week. I follow the same people on twitter. Sometimes I even shy away from looking for new (worthy) ways to give our money away because maybe I’ll feel compelled. A cause, a child, a need will pull my heart in a way that I know will hurt.
And then I take a short walk outside my church and my town. I look at the big world from 8 miles up.
I’ve always known that things are different. I’ve travelled in Europe, ministered in a third world country, gone to church in Massachusetts. But being in a different place and letting the differences affect me are two very different things.
Different doesn’t always mean better. But I think for my whole adult life I’ve been headed toward making myself more comfortable. And for me, routine and sameness is comfort.
But I think I might be ready to pray a brave prayer. I might be ready to be uncomfortable.
I’m ready to let God take me where He wants to take me, use me how He wants to use me, and wreck me how He wants to wreck me.
I want to look with clear eyes at the world that is outside my town and my church. I want to see the world from 39 thousand feet.
That might mean everything might have to change.
I’m going to take that risk. Are you?
What an awesome post! I just got back from the Rockys…we went skiing in Winterpark!!! Good way of putting it!! I am working on this…..”use me”! It is a brave prayer!
Thank you for your thoughts! I always enjoy reading but especially today!
Sheena
This risk I’m familiar with. It can be a lonely and painful road to take, but here and there God shows up and shows me I will be okay. There is so much more meaning in this journey than being comfortable. Of course looking back is always easier. I have my moments, but mostly I am longing to follow after Him despite the cost.
Good perspective. I asked God to take me out of my comfort zone. He did. My husband took a new ministry position and we left our home of 17 years. Glad it is only 2 hours away and it has been really good for me to be moved out of my comfort zone. Warning…don’t ask God to do that unless you really mean it
Awesome post. I can completely relate. I’ve been dealing with changes in my life in the past year and a half. I don’t always like change myself but, when I left for 14 days to China, I almost didn’t have any say in whether or not God was going to change me through my experience. It happened without my knowing and it wasn’t until I got home that I noticed I had changed. I was completely out of my comfort zone and I was scared but now, I wouldn’t change who I am because of that experience for anything.
it is scary. i want to go to africa on a missions trip but i’m afraid that i’ll never want to come back “home” and that means i’ll have to give up the “plan” i’ve created for my life. i too need a brave prayer. thanks for this post…just the push i needed!
It is a brave and scary prayer indeed, and God so loves when we cast ourselves at His feet as an offering to Him.
Yes, I will risk. Yes, I will pray Lord, use me as You will, may Your Kingdom come.
For me it all comes down to – ‘use me Father’. It is scary – we’ve been led far away from friends and family, stretched financially, totally dependant on God – and it looks like an adventure to a lot of people. Yes it is an adventure – but it doesn’t come easy – but as long as we know we are in God’s will we wouldn’t have it any other way. We’re extending the tent poles. Every six months or so I hold a pity party for myself and freak out – but for the mostpart I know God’s peace and provision.
I am so in this same place right now Sarah…feeling so very convicted that what “I” have been planning as my ministry and my path to glorify God’s work in my life is nothing compared to His plan, and that I need to get out of His way.
I need to stop choosing my “safe and comfortable” path of hiding behind my computer screen and doling out words, and only pouring grace & love onto friends and family; and run full throttle into the midst of women I know I can help, in person, because of and with God’s glory.
It is a risk, but in the end, no matter how inadequate we feel or even if we mess it up once committing to jump, it will be ok. God will use it for good and be so pleased at our obedience.
Blessings,
Lindsey
Yes! I am! One of my best friends and I have been talking about this lately and we’ve decided to challenge each other to take more risks, to see how God would use us when we get out of the way, to step outside of comfort and see things differently! It’s gonna be fun!
Uh oh, Sarah Markley. You are in for the ride of your life. Praying that prayer is equally peaceful and tumultuous.
Love you right back.
Uh oh – I am too afraid to be wrecked, but I admire you so much and look forward to hearing about the journey. You are one cool chick, Sarah!
I know exactly where you’re coming from. Since moving (which was a huge step!) to be w/ my husband, I haven’t found a new… lot of things.
I think it’s time I join you in that prayer.
Love that prayer…praying it right there with you and excited and expectant for God to do BIG things! Definitely a “brave” prayer that requires so much “letting go” and “laying down.”
Scary.Fearful.Nervous are a few words that describe the “Surrender All” prayer. …. Some day’s are easier than other’s. I believe it is a daily dying out of your self. It’s tough stuff, this prayer.
…… I stumble on the same.exact.speed bump every.single.time.I stumble……”Dear God, you can have every facet of my heart, my life, but..I am not O.k w/ being single forever and not having children.” ….this is where I am, today.
The only way to see the world as a Christian is through those same lenses my sis. It is truly the only way to fly once you’ve taken the step in. Go deep, it only gets better from here! Trusting the One who has it all figured out is breathtaking and safer than anything this world has to offer us. Even prepackaged Christianity. Let’s go Deeper! Let’s ride the wave of faith! Just wait for the next adventure. There is always one out there to ride! <3
Sadly, most everything about our “Christian” lifestyle is SAFE. Even the way we encapsulate ourselves often with other “Christian” friends in pretty, architectural feats that we label “church.” A lot of people are drawn to this religion (and yes, I use that word purposefully) because it seems to be safe and comfortable. The reality is that the kind of life that Jesus sought to bring us is so revolutionary and so UN-comfortable that many were not able to do it. They weren’t able to move from their comfort zone in order to participate in the kingdom. So they missed out.
In so many ways I believe we have sanitized and muted a gospel that actually calls us to be revolutionary and irrational.
But that’s just me…
I held my breath the whole time I read this, change scares me too. Somedays I welcome it and the closeness to God that comes with it, but most of the time I fight against it. God bless
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