Put it down.
Put down your phone. Or your book. Put down the TV remote or the magazine.
Just drop it.
Pay attention to the three-year-old who has been asking for the past 2 days for you to read the same Curious George book. Sit down and read it to her. Then linger and play Cooking with her in her bedroom. Lay on the floor next to her and see what she wants to do next.
Clear your schedule for the seven-year-old who has been asking for the last month to have a Mom-and-Me day. Take her to get her nails painted in the morning and swimming in the afternoon. Focus on her without having to run around after her little sister. Get your hair wet in the pool and play made-up games with a volleyball and water guns.
Let the sweeping wait until after they’ve gone to bed. Leave the clean laundry unfolded for another day.
Stop doing the dishes and make time for him when he asks you to listen to the song he’s figured out on the guitar. That is more important than having a conversation about the mortgage.
You don’t need to be doing something keep you engaged. Instead, engage yourself with the physical presence of those around you.
Be with your husband.
Watch your children.
Let them have you, and not the sum of what you do.
Originally posted July 28, 2009
Are you as guilty of this as I am?
Guilty.
This was truly a timely word, Sarah. I want THEM to have me. But I also want my God to not have to compute with a computer or a Blackberry.
Thanks.
Just. What. I. Needed. To. Hear. Thanks, Sarah.
Guilty. I must remember these words before they are too big and cool to want a mommy day. But I just recently discovered, my teen son, just wants me to hear him.
Sarah, this goes for grandma’s and grandpa’s too and those of us who have older children. Our son who is 35 came over the other day just ‘to hang out’ for a few minutes.
Time to check in and find out how their world is doing and we will find out if we listen.
Awesome encouragement thanks…
Yes, I’m guilty. Thanks for the timely reminder. My summer days always seem to flow better when I let them have ME.
absolutely love this. my husband is gone for six weeks right now (military) and I see that they need me now even more. we went bike riding last night… loved it. had to take them with me to the grocery store (hubs usually will hang out with the kids while i do things like that) and so my attitude wasn’t quite right… As we got out of the car to go in to the store, a car’s alarm was going off and sounding repeatedly, loudly.. annoyingly. BEEP. BEEP. very loud… I’m thinking can’t they just turn that thing off… and my 4 yr old starts making up a dance to the beat of the alarm. It was the funniest thing. I so needed it. We need them just as much… God uses them to settle us down and remind us of his joy in the mundane.
I wish I had done more of that when they were little. I was so busy being a single mom and surviving that I sometimes forgot to live! I had good friends who made sure we had fun when I would have just stayed in bed, so eventually it all worked out. But now that 17 will be going to college next year and 16 the year after that, I find myself asking, even begging, for little bits of their time, like they did of me. We are still making memories-my daughter and I doing “the Bump” n the aisle at Staples last night, my son volunteering at my school and making all the other teachers fall in love with him. It is never too late-never!
Oh me too, LibraryGirl62! I wish I had done more of that when mine were little. But you’re right, it’s never too late to just stop and listen and ENJOY our children.
awesome. exactly right!! never too late. it makes me smile to see that you see that and are enjoying the here and now. lovely.
Guilty as charged. I definitely needed to hear this. I am ever in need of reminders. Thanks for sharing!
wow. Seeester. You claubered me. Thanks for that, Really.
Guilty! Thanks for the kick-in-the-butt!
SO guilty of this. I have a very hard time living in the present when there is just soo much to do. Thanks for the wake-up call!
eesh…I knew when I saw the title you were going to nail me today…oh how He uses you to speak the Truth I need to hear! Thank you (sort of…) no really, I love your bold, fearless (even though I know you’ve struggled with fear this summer–you are quite brave in your writing!)…He uses you, thanks for being obedient to that call, it ministers to me daily.
This has been my goal this week. Thanks for the reminder!
Guilty. Which is why I’ve been spending much less time on the computer. I don’t want to waste my time behind the screen and miss the beauty in my living room.
I love it. Your posts have really been grabbing my heart lately.
I struggle with this SO MUCH, but not in the way you might think. I struggle with giving her too much of myself, cheating myself and the projects that I need and want to do. There has to be a balance, but I haven’t found it.
Totally and completely guilty. Thanks for the reminder and encouragement.
um, yeah – check out my post from today for evidence.
A fabulous post Sarah!
You have helped me put things in perspective tonight . . .as the kitchen floor remains unswept . . .I didn’t exercise . . .didn’t write those notes I meant to.
You’ve let me off the hook! ha! Also loved the encouragement that it is never too late. Because it seems I can never do enough. God bless!
[...] Let Them Have You – Sarah Markley – I’m proud of myself….I did this on Tuesday night at the pool. My goal when swimming is always to be firmly planted on a lounge chair. Best case, I might stick my feet in, but I’m definitely not putting my face in the water. But I decided to embrace “yes” that night when I was asked to go down a slide (it might also have been the fact that it was 100 degrees at 7 pm) with my girls. Then I got all crazy and jumped off the 5 meter board and was pretty sure I was going to die. [...]
[...] Sarah Markley reminds us to let our children have us [...]
I pray for families with sick children. I am reminded every single day of the precious time we have with our children. So many mothers would give their right arm for one more day to read a book with their child, to be able to see her child run and play and laugh. I have a keychain that reminds me of this and it says “Be There”. And even still sometimes, I falter. I use those words that I really don’t like “Just a minute”. Why? When I know better??? Why? Because I’m human. We all are. I think half the battle of this is the awareness to be there. And I am all too often convicted by this and reminded to try and do better next time. Thank you for this beautiful post Sarah.
Very powerful. This was me a few months ago, and again right now, I can see that I needed the reminder. I really thank God for you. He uses you in so many ways to speak to my soul. Thank-you.
I think this blogs structure is developed well.